Free Food For You (FFFU)

Attention cheapskates, freeloaders and hobos! In an effort to make Malaysians fatter and live shorter, McDonald’s Malaysia is giving away one of their crappiest item from their already craptastic breakfast menu, Sausage McMuffin. So be like a true Malaysian and grab this opportunity because we like free stuff even though this shit is lethal to the human body. For those of you who missed out the coupon giveaway, wipe that inverted arch off your ugly face because I have one right here just for you. Read more

How to Annoy People Effortlessly

Hope everyone had a good break because mine was kinda sucky (don’t ask). Anyhoo, I was at the bank the other day and there was like two million people inside. That’s kinda forgivable since we were just out from a long(ish) public holiday. Amidst all types of people from every imaginable walk of life, all of sudden I smelled something funky. I knew this scent. Very well in fact. Hmm… Let’s see, it’s kinda pungent, very human-like, a bit tangy if you breathe it in with your normal breathing rate. HOLY SHIT it’s BODY ODOUR! Read more

Why Poor Children Are Fat

I was watching one of the popular charity based shows on our local television (not ASSTRO, those assholes copied from TV3 instead and came out with their own) with my dumb friend when she asked me a stupid but interesting question, “Why are those kids so fat? They’re like poor right? I thought that kind of people are skinny because they couldn’t afford food and all…” Read more

Haha, I’m Fatter Than You

If you live where I live, you probably noticed over these couple of days that, (I can’t believe I am writing this)… the fatties are in. Yeap, you heard it right. They’re on the papers, television and everywhere. And it’s not about how they suffer diabetes or need any help. It’s simply because they have accomplish something that not many human beings can achieve. Having 5 times your average age weight (and proud of it). It’s only a matter of time until they got a product endorsement deal. It’s all started with a 10 year old kid from the east coast who weighs about 100kg. Not in pounds, but kilograms. Read more