I Can Has A Datuk Title?

So, uber Bollywood star and world-renowned actor, singer, dancer, heart breaker, rubber tapper Shah Rukh Khan received the coveted “Datuk” status from someone in Malacca or something like that. And I thought Datukship is only meant for Malaysians. Heh. Honestly, I never understand what the title does but I guess it’s similar to the British “Duke” or “Lord” or something? I didn’t know what those do either. Anyignorance, here is my list of people that should receive the illusive title. Yeah, instead of bitching around about how ridiculous this is, why don’t we embrace the fact that pretty much everyone who’s anyone is eligible to be a Datuk nowadays, eh? Read more

If You Can Decode This..

Then chances are either A. you’re no better than Shanigua or B. you’re exactly the type of people she was looking for. It’s like the hooker’s version of the Da Vinci code! Sadly, I decoded this in less than 30 seconds. Shut up! Read more

The Best Malaysian TV Show Ever

I fucking hate how brainless and unoriginal today’s local television programs have become. On this website I often talked about how they sucked but there was one Malaysian made television show that was genius and undoubtedly original. I am writing this with love so you can expect less or no profanity ahead, motherfuckers. Oops. Read more

Astro Blows & There’s Nothing We Can Do About It

It’s kinda pathetic really, while the rest of the world enjoys premium quality high definition broadcasting, we are stuck with blurry analogue crap in Astro. Of course some of you might say, o wise Mister Crap, if you fucking hate Astro so much why you even bother to subscribe? Read more

Coming Soon: Malaysia’s Next Internet Voyeur Star

Ah, another copycat attempt that is truly Malaysian. Actually, being true to Malaysian entertainment principles, they renamed it to “Malaysian Dreamgirl” and being the cheapskate bastards they were, they decided this to be like an online thing, since it’s kinda cool. Yeah, whatever. All we need is another “Malaysia’s Most Beautiful” show that is utterly pointless and waste of time and money. Not to mention, bringing the Malaysian audience few IQ points lower to dumbnation. Read more

sHitz.fm Still the Shittiest Radio Station in Malaysia

Before Fly FM and Red104whatever existed, there was this cool new station called sHitz FM which played more current hits than that dreadful old people’s station Radio 4. From 2001 until today, they claimed that they’re still Malaysia’s no. 1 hit station. Well, probably most of their listeners are idiots and knowing that our country is full of them, their claim just might be true. Let me adjust that a bit. Malaysia’s no. 1 SHIT station, pwned by ASSTRO. Ah, much better. Now it all makes sense to me now! Read more

We Live For This

I’m pretty dry this week so in the mean time, amuse yourselves with my clip of the week. We live for little things like this, y’know? Read more

Malaysian Celebs Sex Scandals: Are We That Stupid?

Malaysian entertainment scene is so boring and pathetic until we create stupid rumors about our celebrities just for the heck of it. I don’t know what’s going in my head but suddenly I figured I want to write about ridiculous Malaysian celebrities rumors. Read more

The Queen iz Dead

You know what I’m talking about. And this proves that I’m a friggin’ genius, too. Also, WTF with what he wore, I know he tried so hard to look preppy but it turned out they look like an old lady’s fingerless gloves. And for someone who call Australia his ‘home base’, WTF with the lame accent? Read more

Listening to These Popular Songs Doesn’t Make You Cool Part 1

These are some of the popular Malaysian favorite English songs since pretty much forever. Listening to any of these foul music does not make you cool. In fact, they’ll make you look like an idiot, which I guess is okay if you already are but pretty fucking annoying to other intelligent beings (like me). Read more

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