Squeaky Shoes Should Never Have Existed

What is more annoying than a 3 year old? A 3 year old with squeaky shoes of course!

I was minding my own business, taking a break from shopping groceries at a food court in this mall (no, I’m not that old, just for a drink, fools) then I heard this disgusting sound. It’s so freaking annoying that I was able to recognize where it came from two second before I heard it.

Whoever invented squeaky shoes for toddlers is a moron. A millionaire maybe but still a moron. It’s like unleashing a very disgusting salivating monster into this world that lives pretty much forever. How could people stand those squeaky hellshoes? They’re not even remotely cute let alone tolerable. If you have children in the annoying age group (1 to 4 year old), I beg you please don’t buy those fucking shoes for them. Just buy anything that does not produce ear piercing sound, or any sound for that matter. If you have those shoes already, it’s never too late burn them or send them to another planet to annoy other life forms or something.

It’s nearly as annoying as those roller skate shoes or whatever fucking name they called them. I swear the next time I saw a kid with those shoes I’m doing to take them off and smack them on his or her head at least three times or until they realized running around while annoying people is NOT fun. So to all of you wannabe parents out there, please don’t teach your children to be annoying assholes by buying them squeaky shoes. They’re tacky and symbolize everything negative about you and how you raise your kids!

Crappy Comments

11 Responses to “Squeaky Shoes Should Never Have Existed”

  1. juli ah on December 24th, 2007 9:38 pm

    i DARE you to smack them in the head, like u meantioned. hahah.

    oh, u forgot to mention the pasar malam ring-ring bells sandals. (whatever they’re called). those bells belong on housedoors, or christmas tree ornaments, or pet cat collars, ppl.

  2. Craplicious on December 24th, 2007 10:30 pm

    Oh yeah, totally forgot about that. People can be SO tacky right? I guess I’ll save them for another post LOL.

  3. juli ah on December 26th, 2007 10:07 am

    wooohoooo. i’ll wait. :D

  4. wah wah on December 27th, 2007 12:51 pm

    Those shoes drive me NUTS! They should be banned for public nuisance and it’s not the kids’ fault either. It’s the frigging retard parents who thought these to be cute… What they are conditioning their kids to be is a social retard who does not respect the privacy of others.

    I say ‘jail the parents or aunties..or whoever buy those kids those shoes..” for causing early hearing problems to the rest of us.

    Another one is those rollerblading shoes..u know the one I mean?

  5. juli ah on December 29th, 2007 11:35 pm

    yesyes. im not sure what they’re called, but yeah. annoyingggggg

  6. brownnoser on January 31st, 2008 4:22 pm

    Absolutely irritating. I hate those shoes that allow them to roll around. I did however pushed a kid.

    She just gave me one cock stare and the mum just.. didn’t know what to say to me.. haha..

  7. brownnoser on January 31st, 2008 4:24 pm

    oh. yea.. she fell.. thats why she gave me that cock look.

  8. Craplicious on January 31st, 2008 4:32 pm

    brownnoser, you pushed a kid? You’re officially my hero.

  9. brownnoser on February 1st, 2008 10:38 am

    couldn’t give a shit about anyone around me if i get irritated. i’d push any kid who rolls around or even take another step on those dumb shoes.

  10. proud momma on July 17th, 2008 3:35 am

    first off the child wearing the shoes enjoys them i agree only about the roller shoes that they should be used for recreation and thats it but as for squeaky shoes I thank God yes God you might want to study up on him he can wash your mouth out with soap…. that someone created theses shoes they are boutique shoes for half the price awesome support for a childs feet and when your in public places you know where your child is . As a parnet which your obviously not your biggest worry is protecting your child and with preditors around and how fast they can get out of your site it allows you to keep up with your precious little one:) Im sure ill get a spme nasty replys but i do take them out in librarys and church but certainly not at malls etc plus my child absolutely loves them and it supports teaching your child to walk correctly otherwise they dont squeak and thats not fun for the little ones

  11. anucia on August 28th, 2008 11:14 pm

    Thats the funniest ever.
    I had no squeaky shoes growing up yet today I am able to walk myself just fine.
    Maybe instead of squeaky shoes, a leash would be a better idea, it’s less annoying..

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